Tuesday, July 06, 2010

Mommy Musings-SOLC

Today Gracie and I are going to try it again. Today she is going to make it the entire time in dance. Today she will participate in her age group community. I am a teacher this is what I do. We can do this together.

As Gracie rushes to my bed I realize that my alarm clocks slept in this morning, "Mommy, I princess dance today?"

"Yes, today is dance, but it's later not now," I reply as I gaze at the clock. 7:00AM. And yes that is sleeping in.

Gracie gets things together pretty easily and we make it to dance a little early to buy our princess outfit.  We go put on the pink leotard, pink tights, pink skirt, and pink ballet shoes.  Gracie twirls and says, "I'm a princess now!"  I smile and take a picture.  Then we go and wait.

"I'm ready for all my prancing princesses," calls the instructor.  A sea of pink flows to her. The youngsters look around at each other and follow the instructor in.

10:15 no sign of Gracie needing me, so I open my book and begin to relax and read.

10:32  Crying. Loud crying. I've known that cry from moment she was born.

10:45 "Is her mother still here?" I see my darling  escorted out by another instructor.  I choke up.  But I go to her and pick her up.

"I just can't do it," she cries.

So  we go home. I don't know what else to do. ""Well, Gracie  let's change your clothes."

"NO!!! I'M A PRETTY PRINCESS!!" She says as she spins around the living room. I realize she won't be taking off her princess outfit.  But, maybe there's hope...perhaps they have dance lessons on DVD.

The problem is I want to cry with her. What is it that makes her feel she can't do it? Neither can the other girls; they are three too.  What have I done that prevents her from being able to participate?  The instructors were so sweet and understanding and gentle.  I just don't understand and maybe that is what motherhood is all about...never understanding--just surviving.

Perhaps the problem doesn't lie with Grace, but with me.  I thought I had motherhood all figured out. I mean how much more difficult could parenthood be? I covered all that with her sister. I lived through a genetic diagnosis, NICU, early intervention, physical therapies, speech therapies, IEPS...the list goes on,so how hard could a "typical" really be?  Well, I think I've found out.

As a teacher I know there is no typical or normal, but I just wish I could figure out how to parent my child who is so full of exuberant life that I want to shout it to the roof tops. I think the real thing for me is fear. I fear what the world will do to this child because LIFE happens. So this isn't really about Gracie...it's about me and my fears.Except, I don't know how to overcome the fear of my child being hurt so greatly it never heals in her heart.



Slice of Life Challenge

I encourage you to participate in the slice of life challenge at Two Writing Teachers.

2 comments:

Stacey said...

Wow Lynnelle. Sounds like you came to a big realization through writing today.

Lynnelle said...

I did Stacey...very cathartic and difficult to write. To be honest I almost went back and deleted it, but I ask my students everyday to take these risks. I need to be the example.